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Wednesday, November 10, 2010

gone, gone, gone....

It was a FABULOUS forty days, but now my beloved is somewhere over the Atlantic en route to Kuwait. I feel totally numb. I don't think the entirety of the situation has completely hit me. Through my tears at the airport we agreed we would end this madness. Five years. Five more years, that's all we'll do of this. Okay, six including this one. That's all the Army gets of my man, then I get him back. I don't know how we'll do it, but we will. I don't ever want luxury cars or big, fancy houses. I want a husband that I can hold and kiss and smell whenever. I want my kids to be able to spontaneously wrestle or play practical jokes on their daddy. I want my family back together.

I know some may say that I knew about this life when I said, "I do." I did know about this life. I lived it as a child. My dad went on cruises with the Navy leaving us for nine months at a time. I, myself, swore not to marry a man in the military. Life and love have other plans for us. I married my soulmate. There is no one on planet Earth better suited for me than Ron. Only, when you're a wife and a mom, you look through the lenses of this life a little differently. You ache for the separation your children have from their father. You feel the emptiness of not having your partner present. It's a whole different enchilada.

I love my country. My husband loves our country. He has served proudly, doing whatever the army has asked of him. This is not a dig on the United States or the army. This is simply a wife missing her husband for another year.

6 comments:

Cassie said...

I am so sorry for you, Tina. Words just can't express how much I hurt for you. I swore those exact same things, and yet here I am. . .madly in love with a man who feels a strong conviction to serve this great country. So far 3 deployments have been more than enough. How is it that Ron got tagged to be gone like this again so soon? What happened to dwell time? Just know that I'm thinking of you and sending hugs and love of understanding, my friend.

teacher jessy said...

Be patient & stay strong dear! I totally understand ur feeling because my dad was a ship captain & we didn't get to grow up with him. He came back only once a year. I missed him dearly then. I pray that you will be strengthen in Him & will rmbr u & the family in prayer :)

Lisa Hjulberg said...

Tina, as an Air Force brat myself, I can totally relate, and my heart breaks for you. Serving in the military is just as hard on the families of those who serve, no doubt about it. God bless you, and may God bless and protect your husband until he returns safely to you.

Hugs,
Lisa

Theresa said...

You and Ron and your children are in my thoughts and prayers.

Silvia said...

God will keep him safe and will bring him back to your arms. I know what you are going through as I experienced something like this right after I got married. My prayers are with you, your husband, and your beautiful children.

hugs,

Theresa said...

Hope you are all hanging in there!! I linked to you in my post tonight!